"I thought you cared about me. I guess you did until you found her."
Out of all the people I have gone out of my way to do things for and that I made things for to make them feel better…
Only one person has actively reciprocated and made me feel appreciated.
I may say I want nothing in return, that I wanted to do it so you’d feel better, but you know what? I want to feel like I didn’t waste my time and do something you would never do for me.
One person has actively made me feel like I did a good thing and made them feel loads better.
Out of more than a dozen people I’ve gone out of my way to do things for. Writing, editing, gif-making. Whatever.
It starts to feel pretty shitty.
And I hate to use a cliche but if you think this is about you it probably is.
I have always felt this way
literally me and my life in a nutshell
Are you ever just overwhelmed by the horrifying thought that maybe, nobody ACTUALLY wants you around? And it’s not that you think everyone hates you, but it’s just that you’re not special to anyone? And that its really kind of sucky that you’re about 98% sure that nobody thinks “Wow, I just really like talking to her.” and that you could probably just disappear without anyone caring that much?